Ups and Downs I AM & I AM NOT

This week has been filled with so many roller coaster rides. Writing papers, thrift store shopping,editing peer papers, a would have been 35th weddding anniversary of a deceased albeit divorced spouse, and a year ago today I was clinically pronounced non-responsive and revived through some miracle of God or was it twisted fate of Satan's torture to put me through Hell again. I think the game and battle is too much fun for the higher players. Today I broke up with the man I thought I would spend the rest of my life with because he too is a player. If I have learned one thing from all this it is to be who I am, proud of who I am and NEVER to forget who I am. In therapy my counselor had me write a list of affirmations, positive thoughts I have about myself here they are:I am intelligent


    I AM

I am attractive

I am confident

I am competent

I am a mother

I am a daughter

I am a sister

I am a Christian

I am loyal

I am trustworthy

I am diligent

I am intuitive

I am vivacious

I am talented

I am artistic

I am a free spirit

I am a drama queen

I am competitive

I have high standards

I am reflective

I am thoughtful

I am compassionate

I am caring

I am loving

I am loved

I am one who uses common sense

I am resourceful

I am frugal

I am highly educated

I am a reading specialist

I am a poet

I am a writer

I am a blogger

I am an entrepeneur

I am a friend

Poems My Way Valrie 04/13/2010

Today in venting and anger here is my poem I am NOT



I am NOT


I am not a fool
I am not a liar
I am not stupid
I am not a user
I am not going to be used
I am not a toy
I am not a convenience
I am not artificial
I am not a servant for abuse
I am not a slave
I am not an imbecile
I am not contrite
I am not obtuse
I am not belligerent
I am not asinine
I am not innocuous
I am  not vindicitive
I am not crass
I am not an ass
I am not uncouth
I am not argumentative
I am not complacent
I am not selfish
I am not a bigot
I am not prejudice
I am not illiterate
I am not uncouth
I am not vulgar
I am not promiscuous
I am not prudish
I am not untrustworthy
I am not unloyal
I am not unfaithful
I am not yours! 

Poems My Way Valrie 06/10/2010



In remininiscence of my deceased husband I also wrote this poem a few days ago... another venting of ups and downs. My therapist tells me i should write more often as it is highly therapeutic for me, yes but it also PAINFUL! What are your thoughts, I need my friends now so please leave comments!

      No Legacy but Tears

Legacy to leave behind
You ask me why not?
I have none left but the tears
That rip my soul in two...

Rather, it's my turn to ask why?
WHY  am I left alone to survive?
Why has my life not  reaped what's sown?
This is unjust, to be alone.

In death for you is there more?
Did you hear Him calling
Your name, knocking upon
The door to which you closed your heart...

To me and to humankind, running
From obligations, you stole away
My dreams, and thus destroyed me,
Along the troddened path you followed.


Deep, headlong into despair,
No matter, all is now lost...
There are no trumpets blaring
Singing songs of praise to opened gates!

A legacy of tears is all I have
To show for all those years shared...
Abandoned now, in my womanhood
Starving for love and left barren.

The fruit of our loins grown
Struggling to find their way in life,
And I alone remain a loving ex-wife
Never truly accepting your departure...

From me to her or to another realm -
Questions I have, and tears running freely
It is time for me to close the door
To this chapter of my life, and so move on...

Poems My Way Valrie 06/07/2010

Well, I guess I better get my rear in geqr and attend to my priorities. Sorry to vent here some but I do feel better after a good long cry and writing some poetry.

This is my blog button!This is me in case you are wondering

BY THE WAY if you help me accomplish my goals, in reaching 100 followers by June 30th, I will send you a beautiful gift (surprise one...) just place my butterfly link button on your blog, send me an email here that you did and become a follower. Anyone who signs up through your blog should also mention they found me through your blog and I will put all new followers and sponsors into a giveaway for reaching my goals. If you browse through my blogs you will see how generous my past giveaways have been! SO COME JOIN MY BLOG ROLL!


HUGS,